January 19th, 2016
I’m feeling very peaceful right now. The majority of the time that I write in here, it’s as a means to process something that I’m really struggling with. But I wanted to record that in this moment, I’m actually feeling good. We just got back from lunch at the hospital, and it surprisingly went really well. I was quite nervous for it, given how difficult it was for me yesterday. Today I had a bag of potato chips, which I was TERRIFIED about, PLUS a grilled item (teriyaki salmon burger). But guess what? I ENJOYED IT!!! I did still have E.D. thoughts, but they didn’t completely overpower my mind and block out the fact that I LIKED the taste of what I was eating, per usual. Once again, I ate 100%. I wasn’t bradycardic for the first time today, which was a small victory, even though I was orthostatic, so still had to have a gatorade. But then I had an individual session with Bryan, and he said that once my vitals are stable for three days, I’ll be on Level B activity level! So I’ll be allowed to walk! WOOHOOOOO! That was obviously pretty encouraging. Okay, time for process.