January 22nd, 2016
Well, we just finished lunch and I feel okay. Better than I did earlier, so that’s something 🙂 Suuuuuper thankful I didn’t have a morning snack today. There’s no way I would’ve been able to do it.
So, I was planning on leaving this joint (lol, just kidding) early to go see a movie with Brad. I also wasn’t going to be here for snack, and was instead going to get something at Starbucks (which I was actually looking forward to). But Dr. Rock saw me in the hall and said that Bryan wanted to talk to me about it, so I went into his office…and the idea got shut down pretty quickly. He said something like that needs to be pre-arranged, which, now thinking about, I know, and I’m not even really sure what I was thinking, to be honest. Anyways, I don’t think I realized how overwhelmed and out of control I was feeling until THAT made me start crying. Not being able to leave a little early to see a movie made me start crying? That’s so unlike me! I’m normally the most flexible person ever. I think it was good though, because I hadn’t let myself cry for a while. It actually felt pretty good afterwards. It was perfect timing, too, because mom had just arrived for our family therapy session! So then I got to cry with her, which made it MUCH better 🙂 Our time with Bryan went really well. I cried multiple times (figures, as I was already an emotional wreck), but I think it was both necessary and helpful for me, and Bryan, and Mom, just so that they could better understand how I’m feeling. Long story short, I can’t leave early to go to the movie, and I have to have my snack here instead of at Starbucks (tears), but we’re going to the movie @ 4:45, so at least I still get to see it and hang with Brad 🙂
Time for reflections,